I want to be Little!

Approximately 12 weeks ago, I joined several friends in a new adventure - Weight Watchers. Over the past three years, I have put on some extra pounds with the fun of motherhood, moving, studying, writing, teaching, and just living life!

Every Thursday morning, I meet my sister and our friend Nicole for a quick weigh-in. Instead of being good members and attending the meetings, however, the three of us always end up skipping the meeting and going out for a big breakfast! You would think this would be counter-productive, but I am thrilled to report that I have lost 15 pounds!

A few weeks ago, Austin asked me if he could make some popcorn. Searching our pantry, he came across several different boxes of popcorn in all shapes and sizes. "Mom-ma?" He yelled from the kitchen. "Why do we have so many boxes of popcorn?"

I came into the kitchen and tried to explain to him that Daddy has some popcorn that he likes to eat (i.e. lots of butter) and I have other popcorn that I like to eat.

As with all things in my house of Austin, this short explanation of mine led to a never ending gunfire of questions about why Daddy and I don't eat the same popcorn.

Trying to simplify the conversation to get on with life, I finally just said, "Austin, mommy is trying to become little again, and that means I can't eat daddy's popcorn."

A few days later we picked up a scale at Walmart - and the numerous questions about scales from my cart led me to state, "Austin, mommy just wants to see if I am getting smaller."

Yesterday afternoon, I weighed myself and realized that I had reached a goal on my scale. In my excitement I yelled out, "James, come look at this scale! Whooo Hoooo!

Austin looked up at me with tears in his eyes. "Mommy, I don't want you to become little. Please stop getting little."

"Austin, why don't you want me to get little?" I asked in confusion, but also hope that my three-year-old already understands the beauty of a woman's soul rather than her figure. Maybe he already understands that his mommy is beautiful just the way she is... but then... he answered my question.

"Because mommy, if you become a little girl again, then you can't be my mommy."

And suddenly, I realized what he has been thinking all these weeks. I have been using the wrong word!

"Oh, Austin, mommy isn't going to become little - or younger, sweetheart. By little, I mean skinny or smaller HERE - (pointing to my waist)."

And Austin looked at me (absolutely relieved) and said, "Oh, that's fine mom. You can get as little as you want."

Weekend???

Where did your weekend go?

Ours flew by...

New Life - b/c we have lots of living to do!

As most of you know, this has been a year of transition and heartache for our family. We have faced obstacles that seemed too costly, too devastating, and too challenging at the time. Only months later would we be able to see how God's hand directed during the most difficult days of our lives so far. We sold our home in Texas, left our jobs, said goodbye to precious friends and moved. Fortunately, we were all able to move... HOME. There is something so comforting in that word... HOME.

For the past nine months, Austin and I have been living with my parents as James tied up loose ends in Texas. January looked like a fresh start and a new opportunity to live together in a new place... and then we received word of my Dad's diagnosis. Cancer.

The word Cancer changes your life. The priorities of our family were brought to light as James and I discussed the best living options of the new year. Austin and I would remain with my parents - helping in any possible way on the home front while my mom and dad lived at the hospital for months at a time.

On Good Friday my Dad received great news - he was dismissed from the bone marrow unit of Moffitt Cancer Institute and told to go HOME! Once again, there is something so healing about this place - this place we all call home.

The Easter weekend brought ideas of the resurrection and redemption to greater understanding in all of our hearts and lives this year. Dad's bone marrow transplant gave him new life. Redemption was also taking place among our immediate family of three. It is time to start fresh - to start anew. To bring new life into that which was thought dead.

The practical needs of my family, Dad's health and his weak immune system, prompted discussions of moving for the little one and me. We will continue to live in two places. We are lucky in this sense. Austin and I have two places to call HOME. To honor our first weekend "living" in Gator country, however, we celebrated. We took Austin to his very first Gator game (the Orange and Blue Game) and we had a swim party with our precious friends.

I look forward to all the new life that the future holds for all of our family.


Buying tickets for the Orange and Blue Game


Austin at his first Gator game. (AJ covers his ears at any loud sound, so we decided it is best for him to use earplugs!)


Our precious new friends over to swim


This weekend, everyone was well enough for us to visit Dad! Austin was able to be near Grandpa for the first time without my dad having to wear a mask!

A Full Heart and a Full Pool!

Last week, Nicole, Jenny, Sharon, Carrie and I decided to take the kids to the pool!



My sister's dear friend, Carrie, was actually on vacation from her own family (and her hysterical life with four children) - but we roped her into going to the pool with us. I am so glad that she was able to sneak away to a corner of the pool for a restful relaxing quiet time.

Our hands were full with three babies and three toddlers, but we had such a wonderful afternoon together enjoying the sun and the kids.







I have so many pictures to share from our day at the pool (and more recent pictures of another day at the pool). Just looking at the pictures makes my heart so full.

Night Day at the Museum

When Austin was recently on Spring Break from school, we decided to visit our local art museum.



We spent the morning walking through galleries, pointing to pictures, talking about colors, and showing Austin his first Monet!!!



Honestly, I was a bit surprised that he seemed to enjoy a "grown-up" art museum, but I want to try to make the most of every opportunity with Austin - to explore his talents, to allow him to dream, to encourage him to find his passions in life.

We found a toy table where Austin could build his own "sculpture," and he was thrilled.



I sat on a bench for at least thirty minutes while Austin played - putting different pieces in different places to make the "perfect" piece of art.



"Look, mom!" He said as he turned around his piece. I just made one beautiful piece of art!"

He doesn't lack for self-confidence or pride in his work.



As we left the museum heading back towards our car, Austin looked up at the "real sculpture."



"Yes," he said to himself under his breath. "Their sculpture almost looks as good as mine."

I enjoyed our day at the art museum, sweet boy, and I cannot wait to see what you create next!

To Spark the Memory Later!

Do you ever feel a bit behind?

Does it ever seem to you that your mind runs faster than you are able to keep up?

That is how I feel about blogging lately. A million things that I want to write, to store, to remember for Austin, but not having the time to sit and write down all the thoughts.

And so, I feel as if my blogs of late mention things: I want to talk about Easter traditions, I want to do a post on forgiveness, I want to talk about Andrew and Austin's "yes/ no" battle that had me laughing out loud... but then, I am so busy enjoying the moments with Austin, James, and my family, that I fall into bed at night without blogging all of my thoughts.

So tonight, just some pictures... and hopefully they will spur me on to record the stories someday soon :)









Oh... and by the way, in case you don't read my dad's blog from his cancer journey, HE IS HOME! AT HIS HOME! RELEASED FROM THE HOSPITAL AND TRANSITIONAL HOUSING! PRAISE THE LORD. What a wonderful Easter surprise!

The Things you Say

The Things you Say:

Dear Austin,

As the beginning of April appeared, I was brought to the sudden realization that you are about to turn four years old! At the end of the month, it will be four years since I gave birth to you - my beautiful son. The past four years have been the most challenging and rewarding years of my life so far, and I have grown as a woman of God because of the things that you teach me on a daily basis. I am so honored to be your mom.

You not only stretch me as a person, you make me laugh out loud every day. I love our moments together, and there are so many Austin-isms that I don't want to ever forget. Here are just a few of your recent quotes:

- Nocturnal. You are completely fascinated with the word "nocturnal." Several months ago, you and I were reading a book about bats (I think) and I mentioned the word and meaning of nocturnal. You did not forget. Last week when I asked you to get ready for bed, you said, "Mom, I am not going to bed tonight. I have decided that I am going to be nocturnal. I am going to start staying awake all night and sleeping through the day instead." You were very serious about your plan - but I made you go to bed anyway.

Whenever you learn about new animals, you want to know if they are nocturnal. You also ask me on a regular basis to list animals for you that are nocturnal. I hate to admit that I typically give you the same list over and over again. "Bats, raccoons... um..." and then I normally change the subject because I keep forgetting to google "nocturnal animals."

Tomorrow morning is Easter. I love Easter. I want to do an entire post about our Easter traditions and meanings. Tonight, however, I simply asked you if you wanted to put your Easter basket outside by the front door so the Easter bunny could hop by and leave you eggs. You paused for a long time before looking at me straight in the eyes, "So mom, are you saying that the Easter bunny is nocturnal????"

So, from now on, my list will be "bats, raccoons, the Easter bunny... um..."

Inside-Out. This is one of my favorite Austin-isms. Instead of saying that something is inside-out. You say that it is "outside-in." I will ask you to go get dressed and you will come out and say, "Mom, can you help me with this shirt. It is "outside-in." I don't correct you because I absolutely love hearing you say it wrong. Well, the other day, I was watching the news and there was a news story about something being "inside out." You laughed out loud. You kept saying, "Inside out? What in the world does that mean? That is the funniest thing I have ever heard. Inside out.... Inside out..." I didn't tell you the truth because I don't want you to stop saying it like you do - "outside in."

New words that we have just started noticing you use this week:

- If I ask you a yes or no question, you always say "yes, indeed!" instead of just yes!

- This morning you started using the word "suspect." We were working on your train table and you said, "Mom, I suspect that you are going to need some more straight pieces."

When you use new words like this, Austin, I typically laugh out loud and say, "Austin, where in the world did you learn that word?" You catch me off guard! You typically shrug your shoulders and say, "I don't know, mom. I don't know where I learned that word." OR... you mention a cartoon that I recently allowed you to watch in order to get some personal time for myself and suddenly I no longer have mommy guilt about placing you in front of the tv on occasion. So, thanks for having such a great memory.

I love you, and I want you to know how precious and precocious you were at three!

Mommy