Thursday, June 4, 2009

To Whom It May Concern:

I am been selected for a very desirable scholarship to help with my PhD work. After meeting with the women from the committee, they have asked me to sit down and write a short paragraph with my biographical information - especially including any prestigious awards from my past.

To Whom It May Concern,

I am so honored that I have been nomiated for the _____ Award for outstanding work among PhD female students. I hope that this short biographical paragraph will give you ample information into my life as a PhD student.

I love to write and study. Just last night I put together 300 pages of work. Unfortunately, none of these pages can be submitted as writing samples for your award. Instead, I created 20 scrapbook pages for each of the 15 children in my preschool class as a memory book of the year. I am, however, pleased to let you know that a sale at Hobby Lobby saved me 50% on all scrapbook stickers. I am not only accomplished on glue and scissors, but I am thrifty as well.

I am experienced in the construction industry, although my current project would be deamed a failure. As I type, I hear my three-year-old son rummaging through the pantry. He has somehow managed to crawl over the "barricade" that I built using baskets and chairs to keep him in his room during naptime.

I am quick to solve problems - for example, giving one of my preschool children a parent's lunch today when their own parent forgot to send one for the school picnic. My quick problem solving, however, is not always appreciated... especially when that child's lunch is found rotting in my classroom later the same day.

I would be honored to win the monetary amount of your award as it would help me pursue my research endeavors. I have a wide research base. Using the proven tests found on facebook, I can tell you that Johnny knows 86% of Sarah's life based on the 10 questions that he just answered. I should also let you know that facebook tells me that if I were a color I would be red, a shoe - Prada, and I will get married at the age of 45. Unfortunately, since I am already married, I am not sure whether the statistics of this test have proven valid and reliable yet. I can let you know in 14 years.

I know that it is important for me to include my previous awards in this letter. For high school choir, I received an award for "the best dressed choir member." While this might not seem like much, it was difficult to find matching keds for all of my outfits when I was fourteen. The white pairs were easy to find... but the pink... I had to look in several stores.

I was not valedictorian or the drum major. I never joined a sorority in college or had dinner with the University President. One of my friends did join a secret society - and she shared with me one of their secrets... but I'm not sure if that will count for your award, and I might not live to accept the award if I told you the secret.

I think that the biggest accomplishment I can claim right now is that I am working on my PhD while teaching 15 preschoolers, loving my husband, mowing my yard, cleaning my house, and watching my precious three-year-old boy. These are the best qualities that I can give you for earning this award - for this is the reality of a female PhD student. We want to receive honors and grants, writing proposals, and publications. Sometimes, however, we just want to finish a paper before the dryer buzzes letting us know that our "other world" is calling. As I write this, in fact, my son has consumed an entire bag of bbq chips. I now must go and brush his teeth, get him back behind his barricade - I mean back in bed, and then plan what to have for dinner, since he just ate my side dish.

Please let me know if you have any questions or need any recommendations.

Sincerely,

Emily