Saturday, June 27, 2009

Ode to the Man Sitting Next to Me!

Dear Popular Author,

I wanted to let you know how much I enjoy reading your books. Your storytelling often leaves me laughing out loud while rapidly turning pages to read more about your delightful characters. I was so pleased to see that our local library carried several of your books. I picked them up recently to fill the hours of travel between America and Oxford. Last night as I boarded my plane, I couldn't wait to read more than the first few chapters I had just finished in the terminal. Apparently, however, mr young man sitting next to me didn't think the amazing storyline you depicted in your front cover was nearly as enthralling as his own storytelling. I am sorry that your most recent book served merely as an accessory to my coca-cola as Mr. young man shared too much information.

Sincerely,

Emily

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Dear Mr. young man sitting next to me,

You seem like a very delightful and energetic person. I am sure that your friends enjoy your company and storytelling. I need to let you know, however, that beginning a conversation on a plane with a stranger about plane crashes is never (and I mean NEVER) a good idea. I know that you wanted to discuss all of the findings of the recent AirFrance crash, but you could have at least waited until we were finished with take off to start discussing such tragedies of airplane history.

In addition, I need to let you know that I am not a professional or marriage counselor. I am so sorry that you and your girlfriend of three years are having trouble, but please don't ask me whether or not you should break up. After all, we met fifteen minutes ago and have only discussed the history of airplane fatalities. Unfortunately, it sounds like your relationship is also going down in flames.

It was an interesting ten hours with you, sir. And to answer the question you took way too seriously, Yes, I do know how to swim... but I honestly don't think it would help over the Atlantic.

Emily

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Dear American Airlines,

If mr. young man sitting next to me is on my next flight, I am changing carriers.

Emily

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Dear Lunch staff at Regent College at Oxford,

Your lunch made me almost forget about mr. young man on the plane next to me. Who knew how much I would love little finger sandwhiches with tuna and cumcumbers! Oh, I tasted heaven today at your meal! Well, what I think heaven might taste like. According to mr. young man sitting next to me I might get a taste of heaven for sure if I keep flying.

Emily

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Dear Mom and Dad,

Here are some pictures of my first day at Oxford. The flowers are sitting outside my dorm room window. So Colorful... Almost as colorful as mr. young ... Well, you get the idea!

Love you,

Emily

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4 comments:

carrie said...

YOu are so funny! Kurt would have decked Mr. young! I hope you are having a glorious time! But please be safe, I need you to come home!
Love ya,
Ms Carrie

Texasholly said...

I can NOT believe that a perfect stranger (and I use the word perfect loosely) would DARE bring up the subject of plane crashes on an airplane flight. If I were his girlfriend of three years I would break up with him for lack of judgment alone...

The photos are AMAZING.

The Buggs said...

he has a girlfriend? for three years?

Jenny said...

so funny! love it! I still think the sandwiches sound delicious, too!